Today’s NBA Commissioner David Stern’s birthday. The Commander-in-Chief of the NBA has basically everything that any 70-year-old would ever want – a beautiful family, people actually listen to what he says, an awesome car & courtside tickets to the Knicks…

So what do you get the man that has everything? Us at #believethehype think his birthday wishlist looks something like this:

• Some of those cool championship slippers Chris Bosh has.
• An NFL lockout.
• Mark Cuban to jump out of a birthday cake & sing “Happy Birthday Mr President”.
• NBA Players to actually follow the NBA Dress Code that he implemented in October 2005 again… That would mean no more long-sleeved tank tops by Dwyane Wade.
• 6 more ad breaks in the final 2mins of Playoff Games.
• Those damn teenagers in the apartment downstairs to turn their music down.
• Obama to give him a call & say he’s dumping Joe Biden so Stern can be his new running mate… Then 2 days after the election, Obama says, “f*ck it… Stern, you can be President.”
• A rule change where the Lakers need to win by 20 points for their win to be officially registered.
• A phone call from LeBron James.
• The Kings, Jazz, Timberwolves & Magic to all move from their small markets to New York City.

Anyways, Happy Birthday David Stern!!!